mother, he says, mother my belly is full of diamonds

mother, he says, mother my belly is full of diamonds

hi, ikea? yes this is sarah again we’ve changed our minds we’re keeping him he’s going to make a really majestic doorstop

hi, ikea? yes this is sarah again we’ve changed our minds we’re keeping him he’s going to make a really majestic doorstop

hi is this ikea’s customer service desk? yeah just calling to let you know we got an extra part in the flat pack of our dresser, it’s around 11 pounds, black & white, fluffy, eyes like yellow vortexes, it’s creepy as fuck to be quite honest can we just stick a few stamps on it and send it back? cheers yeah it’s just the most awful thing we’ve ever seen but the dresser is v.cute. loving the 70’s look you guys are rolling with this season

hi is this ikea’s customer service desk? yeah just calling to let you know we got an extra part in the flat pack of our dresser, it’s around 11 pounds, black & white, fluffy, eyes like yellow vortexes, it’s creepy as fuck to be quite honest can we just stick a few stamps on it and send it back? cheers yeah it’s just the most awful thing we’ve ever seen but the dresser is v.cute. loving the 70’s look you guys are rolling with this season

iamnotafeministtbh:

(via Twitter / sugeztun_notid: Big Jim leading the way for …)

This is the inside joke of creative writing programs in America. We know creative writing doesn’t make money, and yet we continue to graduate talented writers with no business acumen. At best, it is misguided. At worst, it is fraudulent.

iamnotafeministtbh:

(via Twitter / swimmerdonegal: Big crowd at protest & …)

bakeandobliviate:

saturnineaqua:

gdirtydime19:

wow

and thats why they killed him

He was amazing 

(Source: afriet)

however catching him the split second after he yawns isn’t too bad either

however catching him the split second after he yawns isn’t too bad either

the most pure joys in life include mo forgetting to put his tongue back in his mouth

the most pure joys in life include mo forgetting to put his tongue back in his mouth